I just got sent this today. lol
Dear Connie,
>
>
>
> I know the counselor said we shouldn't contact each other
during
>our
>"cooling off" period, but I couldn't wait anymore. The day you left, I
>swore
>I'd never talk to you again. But that was just the wounded little boy
in me
>talking. Still, I never wanted to be the first one to make contact. In
my
>fantasies, it was always you who would come crawling back to me. I
guess my
>pride needed that. But now I see that my pride's cost me a lot of
things.
>I'
>m tired of pretending I don't miss you. I don't care about looking bad
>anymore. I don't care who makes the first move as long as one of us
does.
>
>
>
> Maybe it's time we let our hearts speak as loudly as our
hurt. And
>this is what my heart says: "There's no one like you, Connie." I look
for
>you in the eyes and breasts of every woman I see, but they're not you.
>They'
>re not even close.
>
>
>
> Two weeks ago, I met this girl at Flamingos and brought her
home
>with me. I don't say this to hurt you, but just to illustrate the
depth of
>my desperation. She was young, maybe 19; with one of those perfect
bodies
>that only youth and maybe a childhood spent ice skating can give you.
I
>mean, just a perfect body. Tits like you wouldn't believe and an ass
that
>just wouldn't quit. Every man's dream, right? But as I sat on the
couch
>being blown by this stunner, I thought, look at the stuff we've made
>important in our lives. It's all so superficial. What does a perfect
body
>mean? Does it make her better in bed?
>
>
>
> Well, in this case, yes, but you see what I'm getting at.
Does it
>make her a better person? Does she have a better heart than my
moderately
>attractive Connie? I doubt it. And I'd never really thought of that
before.
>
>
>
> I don't know, maybe I'm just growing up a little. Later,
after I'd
>tossed her about a half a pint of throat yogurt, I found myself
thinking,
>"Why do I feel so drained and empty?" It wasn't just her flawless
technique
>or her slutty, shameless hunger, but something else. Some nagging
feeling
>of
>loss. Why did it feel so incomplete? And then it hit me. It didn't
feel the
>same because you weren't there to watch.
>
>
>
> Do you know what I mean? Nothing feels the same without you.
>Jesus,
>Connie, I'm just going crazy without you. And everything I do just
reminds
>me of you.
>
>
>
> Do you remember Carol, that single mom we met at the Holiday
Inn
>lounge last year? Well, she dropped by last week with a pan of
lasagna. She
>said she figured I wasn't eating right without a woman around. I
didn't
>know
>what she meant till later, but that's not the real story.
>
>
>
> Anyway, we had a few glasses of wine and the next thing you
know,
>we
>'re banging away in our old bedroom. And this tart's a total monster
in the
>sack. She's giving me everything, you know, like a real woman does
when
>she'
>s not hung up about her weight or her career and whether the kids can
hear
>us. And all of a sudden, she spots that tilting mirror on your
>grandmother's
>old vanity. So she puts it on the floor and we straddle it, right, so
we
>can
>watch ourselves. And it's totally hot, but it makes me sad, too. Cause
I
>can
>'t help thinking, "Why didn't Connie ever put the mirror on the floor?
>We've
>had this old vanity for what, 14 years, and we never used it as a sex
toy."
>
>
>
> Saturday, your sister drops by with my copy of the
restraining
>order. I mean, Vicky's just a kid and all, but she's got a pretty good
head
>on her shoulders and she's been a real friend to me during this
painful
>time. She's given me lots of good advice about you and about women in
>general. She's pulling for us to get back together, Connie, she really
is.
>So we're doing Jell-O shots in a hot bubble bath and talking about
happier
>times. Here's this teenage girl with the same DNA as you and all I can
do
>is
>think of how much she looked like you when you were 18.And that just
about
>makes me cry. And then it turns out Vicky's really into the whole anal
>thing, that gets me to thinking about how many times I pressured you
about
>trying it and how that probably fueled some of the bitterness between
us.
>But do you see how even then, when I'm thrusting inside your baby
sister's
>cinnamon ring, all I can do is think of you?
>
>
>
> It's true, Connie. In your heart you must know it. Don't you
think
>we could start over? Just wipe out all the grievances away and start
fresh?
>
>
>
> I think we can.
>
>
>
> If you feel the same please, please, please let me know.
>
>
>
> Otherwise, can you let me know where the fucking remote is?
>
>
>
> Love,
>
>
>
> Dan