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> Jokes, anyone got any good ones to tell?

foxy lady
post Apr 12 2006, 02:46 PM
Post #1


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From: St. Catherines - Niagara, Ontario
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The inventor of the Harley-Davidson motorcycle,
Arthur Davidson, died and went to heaven. At
the gates, St. Peter told Arthur. "Since you've
been such a good man and your motorcycles have
changed the world, your reward is, you can hang
out with anyone you want to in heaven."
Arthur thought about it for a minute and then
said, "I want to hang out with God."
St. Peter took Arthur to the Throne Room, and
introduced him to God.
God recognized Arthur and commented, "Okay, so
you were the one who invented the
Harley-Davidson motorcycle?"
Arthur said, "Yeah, that's me...."
God commented: "Well, what's the big deal in
inventing something that's pretty unstable,
makes noise and pollution and can't run without
a road?"
Arthur was apparently embarrassed, but finally
spoke, "Excuse me, but aren't you the inventor of woman?"

God said, " Ah, yes."
"Well ," said Arthur, "professional to
professional, you have some major design flaws
in your invention:


1. There's too much inconsistency in the front-end protrusion



2. It chatters constantly at high speeds


3. Most rear ends are too soft and wobble too much


4. The intake is placed way too close to the exhaust


5. The maintenance costs are outrageous!!!!


"Hmmmmm, you may have some good points there,"
replied God, "hold on."

God went to his Celestial supercomputer, typed
in a few words and waited for the results. The
computer printed out a slip of paper and God
read it.

"Well, it may be true that my invention is
flawed," God said to Arthur, "but according to
these numbers, more men are riding my invention
than yours.


--------------------
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Posts in this topic
foxy lady   Jokes   Apr 12 2006, 02:46 PM
ddd35   We just bought a race horse to run in next yrs k...   Aug 9 2007, 02:07 PM
bntit   A man and a woman are sitting at a bar during Happ...   Aug 11 2007, 12:47 PM
rdmoscow1808   enjoy!!   Aug 13 2007, 09:51 AM
rdmoscow1808   FAMILY Three sisters, ages 92, 94 and 96, live in...   Aug 15 2007, 09:51 AM
Bobaloo   That was hilarious. Joke of the thread, in my bo...   Aug 15 2007, 02:34 PM
ddd35   well and the million to win .. :P   Aug 16 2007, 10:18 AM
Bobaloo   Well, that's a perk for sure, but the girls s...   Aug 16 2007, 10:42 AM
ddd35   yes , yes it does .   Aug 17 2007, 03:49 PM
closeup   The Bathtub Test! During a visit to the menta...   Aug 26 2007, 09:12 AM
evade20   Welcome to the monkey house! :roflmao:   Aug 26 2007, 09:18 AM
evade20   http://www.jowsey.com/jokes/sheep-NZ.jpg ...   Aug 26 2007, 11:37 AM
Bobaloo   that pic is just wrong. i mean, i can't beli...   Aug 27 2007, 12:33 AM
ddd35   I thought they should have hung there hats on th...   Sep 2 2007, 07:12 AM
rdmoscow1808   A man is stumbling through the woods totally drunk...   Sep 2 2007, 10:00 AM
rdmoscow1808   An American is having breakfast, in Paris, one mor...   Oct 8 2007, 12:37 PM
aimee2   Bears & Beer A bear walks into a bar in Bill...   Oct 10 2007, 10:44 PM
rdmoscow1808   :roflmao: :roflmao: :lol: :lol:   Oct 12 2007, 09:30 AM
bondiguy   Q.Why don't women need a watch? A.There's...   Nov 30 2007, 01:45 AM
DoubleJ   Classy   Nov 30 2007, 02:26 AM
bondiguy   LOL sorry.... it is funny though. I have a milli...   Nov 30 2007, 02:38 AM
DoubleJ   no need to apologize man, i can't remember t...   Nov 30 2007, 02:42 AM
bondiguy   touche.... Q.Why are women's feet smaller t...   Nov 30 2007, 02:45 AM
DoubleJ   haha, but as terrible as it may make me seem I t...   Nov 30 2007, 02:49 AM
bondiguy   The more sexist or racist the joke is... the fun...   Nov 30 2007, 02:51 AM
DoubleJ   and no matter what you say on here chances are i...   Nov 30 2007, 02:56 AM
bondiguy   Yes sir... these lovely ladies have my back and ...   Nov 30 2007, 03:07 AM
DoubleJ   hmmm, a back-man odd most guys are boob or ass o...   Nov 30 2007, 03:11 AM
bondiguy   I am definitely the latter and yes, I have often...   Nov 30 2007, 03:15 AM
DoubleJ   yeah don't tell any women that may need the ...   Nov 30 2007, 03:22 AM
bondiguy   Excellent swordsmenship I take it? lol Another ...   Nov 30 2007, 03:24 AM
DoubleJ   When did woman get the right to cross the street...   Nov 30 2007, 03:27 AM
bondiguy   BAM! :P   Nov 30 2007, 04:22 PM
closeup   That reminds me: Why do brides always wear white?...   Dec 2 2007, 02:32 AM
ddd35   LOL :2thumbsup:   Dec 2 2007, 01:59 PM
Kiana   :roflmao: :thumbup:   Dec 1 2007, 12:30 PM
valoish   Saddam's last thrill http://i65.photobucket....   Dec 1 2007, 03:01 PM
valoish   Women's favorite Shop http://www.watchersweb....   Dec 1 2007, 03:18 PM
bondiguy   Thanks hun! :lol: Yeah I was fishing for ...   Dec 3 2007, 12:19 AM
misschickie   Bondi and closeup... :lol: :lol: :lol: Q: How...   Dec 4 2007, 01:32 AM
closeup   Okay, we're even. Here's one: Why can...   Dec 4 2007, 01:41 AM
misschickie   ok, that cracked me up like an egg. :roflmao:   Dec 4 2007, 01:53 AM
DoubleJ   hey some people might be in to that sort of thin...   Dec 4 2007, 02:08 AM
misschickie   Is that a rake in your pocket or are you just ha...   Dec 4 2007, 02:13 AM
DoubleJ   no pockets, i've been free from my pants for...   Dec 4 2007, 02:16 AM
misschickie   NICE...I hate it when I have to wrestle a man ou...   Dec 4 2007, 02:21 AM
DoubleJ   I bet they usually cum easy for you though when y...   Dec 4 2007, 02:23 AM
misschickie   Well, lets just see about that, shall we? (yes,...   Dec 6 2007, 01:50 AM
DoubleJ   not near cozy enough if you ask me   Dec 6 2007, 02:11 AM
bondiguy   :lol: I had not heard that before... not bad at ...   Dec 6 2007, 12:33 AM
misschickie   :lol: and :lol: Now, here is one Just for you...   Dec 6 2007, 01:49 AM
bondiguy   Funny coz it's true! lol Q. What do you...   Dec 6 2007, 02:05 AM
misschickie   :kisses: lol...those are terrible!!...   Dec 6 2007, 02:21 AM
bondiguy   <_< Q. How many men does it take to ope...   Dec 6 2007, 06:21 AM
Damor   Thats good! See if this one has been said be...   Dec 6 2007, 07:58 AM
bondiguy   Not bad... Q. How do you turn a fox into an ele...   Dec 6 2007, 11:58 PM
Damor   Q. What do you call three blondes standing in a r...   Dec 7 2007, 12:09 AM
bondiguy   :lol: nice one   Dec 7 2007, 12:54 AM
misschickie   :lol: :lol: :lol:   Dec 8 2007, 02:13 PM
misschickie   oh very nice...lol :lol:   Dec 8 2007, 02:12 PM
UncleBuck   Q: How do you tell when a woman is going to say s...   Dec 8 2007, 03:18 PM
misschickie   Man translations... When a man says: CAN I HELP W...   Dec 8 2007, 04:51 PM
Damor   I got one.. Q. How do you keep a blonde in suspe...   Dec 10 2007, 12:41 AM
bondiguy   Beautiful... I love it! Tell me the answe...   Dec 10 2007, 12:43 AM
UncleBuck   > >>Subject: Diplomatic > >>A ma...   Dec 11 2007, 03:16 PM
closeup   Did you hear about the flasher who was gonna retir...   Dec 18 2007, 05:31 PM
bondiguy   lol that joke sounds like it should have a multi...   Dec 18 2007, 11:11 PM
aimee2   Q. Why do hookers make more money than drug dealer...   Dec 24 2007, 03:10 AM
UncleBuck   :roflmao: :roflmao: :roflmao:   Dec 28 2007, 12:03 PM
evade20   :lol: :lol:   Dec 28 2007, 12:43 PM
ddd35   :roflmao:   Jan 3 2008, 01:54 PM
closeup   A classic:   Jan 3 2008, 11:08 PM
evade20   Damn, Cut that dude off! :roflmao: :roflm...   Jan 4 2008, 05:06 AM
closeup   Check this out:   Feb 15 2008, 04:19 PM
evade20   It reminds me of your former sig. pic that seem...   Feb 15 2008, 10:48 PM
closeup   This one?   Feb 16 2008, 01:21 PM
evade20   No! :roflmao:   Feb 17 2008, 12:02 AM
rdmoscow1808   A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husban...   Feb 19 2008, 11:04 AM
rdmoscow1808   A man is driving along a highway and sees a rabbit...   Mar 24 2008, 06:09 PM
evade20   :roflmao:   Mar 24 2008, 10:46 PM
betty   A cardiologist died and was given an elaborate fun...   Mar 25 2008, 03:02 AM
UncleBuck   Dear Tech Support, Last year I upgraded from Gir...   Apr 5 2008, 11:45 PM
evade20   :roflmao:   Apr 5 2008, 11:54 PM
ddd35   thats a crack up   Apr 8 2008, 03:12 PM
rdmoscow1808   :2thumbsup: :2thumbsup: :2thumbsup: Absolute...   Apr 10 2008, 04:34 PM
UncleBuck   As an airplane is about to crash, a female passeng...   Apr 8 2008, 11:14 PM
juicyboobs   :roflmao:   Apr 9 2008, 04:21 AM
closeup   check this out:   Apr 12 2008, 04:27 PM
ddd35   a nice repeat :P   Apr 13 2008, 11:21 AM
chelsey   Why are married women heavier than single women? ...   Apr 13 2008, 09:57 PM
ddd35   OUCH !!!!!   Apr 14 2008, 04:56 PM
UncleBuck   [size=14]Well, sometimes life is a bitch You come ...   May 24 2008, 04:33 PM
UncleBuck   The Harley-Davidson Facts The inventor of the H...   Jun 27 2008, 09:25 AM
TiGGrrr   In support of Barack Obama, Women all over the Uni...   Nov 6 2008, 04:54 PM
penman   Barack Obama has only been president a few hours a...   Nov 7 2008, 06:16 PM
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